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Published on:

3rd Jan 2023

Is it Time to Divorce? You Don't Have to Fight it Out in Court

Today I am so excited to share my interview with Keith and Sheila Hittner from the Our Healthy Homes radio show. In this dynamic episode we talk about why I became a mediator and how I work with and support my clients. We also discuss one of the biggest stressors in relationships, why mediation is so important, and who is a good fit for mediation. Tune in to learn more about the mediation process from beginning to end and so much more!

In this episode:

[01:00] Why Lesa became a mediator. [05:00] Why finances are stressors in relationships. Can a couple fighting over finances come to an agreement and stay together? [09:20] Building a mindful budget. [10:45] How does Lesa help her clients do divorce differently? [16:00] What does the mediation process look like? [21:30] How does Lesa work with different personality types? [23:00] Lesa shares how being a mediator has helped her grow as a person. [25:00] Lesa shares her online Minnesota Divorce Course. [30:00] Why working together with a mediator through divorce can work. [36:00] Why being honest through the divorce process is so important to create a successful divorce plan.

Key Takeaways:

Finances are one of the main stressors in relationships. Divorce is hard. There are a lot of emotions and frustrations involved. A mediator can help a divorcing couple work through that process and set themselves up for success. You can make your divorce how you want it. It will be within the parameters of the law, but it’s your divorce. As long as you understand what you are doing, shouldn’t you be the one deciding that?

Quotes:

“Money is stressful. There may not be enough of it or you may feel like one person isn’t pulling their weight or someone loses a job, that can add stress and lead someone down the road towards divorce.” - Lesa Koski

“Sometimes the people you love the most are the ones you’re not the best to.” - Lesa Koski

“If you want to find what the problem is, most of the time the problem is looking back at you in the mirror. So if you deal with your own issues, you’re better able to get along with other people.” - Keith Hittner

Resources:

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Our Healthy Homes Website

Our Healthy Homes Facebook

Our Healthy Homes Twitter

Our Healthy Homes Podcast

Mentioned in this episode:

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A Podcast Guide to Doing Divorce Differently

About the Podcast

Doing Divorce Different A Podcast Guide to Doing Divorce Differently
Divorce, co-parenting, menopause, marriage, and starting over after 40—Doing Divorce Different is your guide to a healthy, faith filled life transition.

Hosted by Family Law Attorney and Mediator Lesa Koski, Doing Divorce Different is a candid, empowering podcast designed to take the fear out of divorce and guide you toward peace—whether you’re navigating a split, working to stay married, or rebuilding a better life after a major transition. Each week, Lesa brings heart-centered legal insight, emotional support, and holistic wisdom to help you heal, grow, and thrive.

We cover everything from amicable divorce and co-parenting strategies to parenting plans that actually work and support kids in thriving through change. You’ll learn how to prepare for marriage with prenups, revisit your relationship with post-nuptial agreements, and understand what it really takes to stay married or rekindle love after a rough season. If you're in the midst of a grey divorce, wondering how to not get divorced, or questioning whether love can be found again, this show is for you.

Lesa also explores the emotional and physical changes that often accompany midlife and major life shifts. From navigating the impact of menopause on your health, marriage, and mood, to dealing with the loneliness that can come after divorce or empty nesting, you’ll find honest conversations that don’t shy away from real-life challenges. And for those of you in your 40s, 50s, or beyond, you’ll discover what it means to truly build a better life after 40.

Health and wellness are deeply integrated into this journey. Lesa shares insights on the benefits of rest, joy, nutrition, fasting, protein, and bone health, along with the power of movement, community, and exercise to support mental clarity and physical strength. You’ll learn how to take care of yourself with intention—because healing isn’t just emotional, it’s also biological.

Mindset work and self-coaching are recurring tools offered in episodes to help you reframe your story and shift from fear to freedom. And through it all, the show honors the role of faith, spiritual surrender, and letting God lead you through every season. Whether you're leaning into your relationship with God for the first time or deepening a lifelong practice, you’ll hear how surrender can bring peace even in the hardest moments.

You’ll hear real stories from people who have done divorce differently, saved their marriages, or found new love and purpose on the other side. Lesa also brings in conversations about marriages that have stood the test of time, co-parenting through complex seasons, and the realities of parenting after separation while maintaining stability for your kids.

This is not just a podcast about divorce. Doing Divorce Different is about taking back your life, rewriting your future, and trusting that you’re not starting over, you’re starting better. If you’re craving practical advice, soul-level encouragement, and real conversations about creating a healthy, joyful, purpose-driven life, you’ve found your community.

Subscribe now and join Lesa Koski for weekly episodes that will help you grow stronger in your relationships, your health, and your faith, no matter where you’re starting from.

About the Host:
I’ve spent over 25 years helping families navigate amicable divorce as a lawyer and mediator, always focused on protecting what matters most—your kids and your peace of mind. But my mission has expanded. Today, I support women over 40 not just through endings, but in building stronger relationships—and sometimes even saving their marriages. I’m a breast cancer survivor, a cowgirl at heart, a wellness advocate, and a follower of Jesus. My life and faith fuel my passion for helping women thrive.

About your host

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Lesa Koski