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Published on:

2nd Aug 2022

Ten Minutes with Tracy: Change Your Divorce Story

On today's episode of Ten Minutes with Tracy, We discuss changing your divorce story. Tracy and Lesa talk about becoming better listeners and diving into the art of understanding. When going through mediation, marriage counseling, or divorce, there are many benefits to listening to the other person's perspective and not feeling like you have to respond. We also discuss the stories that we tell ourselves that others learn to know about us that create our identities. Tune in today to learn how to look at these identities differently and allow yourself to see what you are becoming.

In this episode:

[1:06] The importance of listening and understanding. [4:43] Becoming divorce and becoming the next version of yourself. [5:43] When working on yourself, be intentional about listening and understanding; most of the time, the other person follows suit. [7:32] The stories and meaning that we create for our lives.

Key Takeaways:

Your current identity does not have to be permanent. You are allowed to become someone new and create a new identity of yourself if the old one no longer serves you. Your spouse, loved ones, and friends may carry the identity you have created with you and tell your story even if it doesn’t serve you any longer. Breathe in your new identity and move towards the next version of yourself, then share that with those close to you so they can also communicate the next version of you. Listening and understanding do not require responding. Learning to be intentional in listening and hearing what someone else is telling you is sometimes all that is needed. Knowing where they are coming from and not feeling the need to agree or disagree is a skill that can take you far in life.

Quotes:

“If we can remind ourselves that all we need to really do is understand the other person. So we could actually enter into a conversation with the commitment to listen so intently that we understand their point of view.” - Tracy Pleschourt

“It requires you to give up that story, that belief that you have about that person, and really just take under consideration, what if that story is wrong, what if that isn't even inaccurate. Just allow yourself to take that in for a moment; it opens up the door for so many possibilities.” - Tracy Pleschourt

Guest Bio:

Tracy Pleschourt, the Founder of Self-Made U helps men and women create Self-Made wealth and wellness through life coaching. Tracy has mastered and now teaches the critical skills necessary to manage your mind and overcome any obstacle, including overeating, over drinking, time management, career & relationship changes.

Resources:

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

Lesa Koski Website

Mentioned in this episode:

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A Podcast Guide to Doing Divorce Differently

About the Podcast

Doing Divorce Different A Podcast Guide to Doing Divorce Differently
Divorce, co-parenting, menopause, marriage, and starting over after 40—Doing Divorce Different is your guide to a healthy, faith filled life transition.

Hosted by Family Law Attorney and Mediator Lesa Koski, Doing Divorce Different is a candid, empowering podcast designed to take the fear out of divorce and guide you toward peace—whether you’re navigating a split, working to stay married, or rebuilding a better life after a major transition. Each week, Lesa brings heart-centered legal insight, emotional support, and holistic wisdom to help you heal, grow, and thrive.

We cover everything from amicable divorce and co-parenting strategies to parenting plans that actually work and support kids in thriving through change. You’ll learn how to prepare for marriage with prenups, revisit your relationship with post-nuptial agreements, and understand what it really takes to stay married or rekindle love after a rough season. If you're in the midst of a grey divorce, wondering how to not get divorced, or questioning whether love can be found again, this show is for you.

Lesa also explores the emotional and physical changes that often accompany midlife and major life shifts. From navigating the impact of menopause on your health, marriage, and mood, to dealing with the loneliness that can come after divorce or empty nesting, you’ll find honest conversations that don’t shy away from real-life challenges. And for those of you in your 40s, 50s, or beyond, you’ll discover what it means to truly build a better life after 40.

Health and wellness are deeply integrated into this journey. Lesa shares insights on the benefits of rest, joy, nutrition, fasting, protein, and bone health, along with the power of movement, community, and exercise to support mental clarity and physical strength. You’ll learn how to take care of yourself with intention—because healing isn’t just emotional, it’s also biological.

Mindset work and self-coaching are recurring tools offered in episodes to help you reframe your story and shift from fear to freedom. And through it all, the show honors the role of faith, spiritual surrender, and letting God lead you through every season. Whether you're leaning into your relationship with God for the first time or deepening a lifelong practice, you’ll hear how surrender can bring peace even in the hardest moments.

You’ll hear real stories from people who have done divorce differently, saved their marriages, or found new love and purpose on the other side. Lesa also brings in conversations about marriages that have stood the test of time, co-parenting through complex seasons, and the realities of parenting after separation while maintaining stability for your kids.

This is not just a podcast about divorce. Doing Divorce Different is about taking back your life, rewriting your future, and trusting that you’re not starting over, you’re starting better. If you’re craving practical advice, soul-level encouragement, and real conversations about creating a healthy, joyful, purpose-driven life, you’ve found your community.

Subscribe now and join Lesa Koski for weekly episodes that will help you grow stronger in your relationships, your health, and your faith, no matter where you’re starting from.

About the Host:
I’ve spent over 25 years helping families navigate amicable divorce as a lawyer and mediator, always focused on protecting what matters most—your kids and your peace of mind. But my mission has expanded. Today, I support women over 40 not just through endings, but in building stronger relationships—and sometimes even saving their marriages. I’m a breast cancer survivor, a cowgirl at heart, a wellness advocate, and a follower of Jesus. My life and faith fuel my passion for helping women thrive.

About your host

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Lesa Koski