Saddle Up for Purpose: Finding Your Calling After Divorce, Diagnosis, or a Life Pivot

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Welcome listeners.

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I'm so thankful you're here today.

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And today I'm going to do the saddle up

segment with, which is just going over

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key takeaways from Tuesday's episode

where we had attorney Heather quick with

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us and she is a Florida divorce attorney.

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But that wasn't really why I had her on,

and I maybe threw her a little bit for

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a loop, but it was a great conversation.

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I really wanted to talk

to her about empowering.

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All women, because I wanna help,

of course, I wanna help, um,

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women through divorce and beyond.

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I mean, I'm still doing divorce coaching.

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I also have that online

parenting plan course to help

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couples divorce well together.

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But I really am changing the focus of.

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To just help women in general

when we go through something hard.

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I've been through something hard and

you know, sometimes just the little

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things in life are hard, like maybe.

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Becoming an empty nester maybe.

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Maybe it is a divorce, maybe it is

a diagnosis, but whatever it is,

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I just want you to know it's not

too late to start feeling better.

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And what Heather kind of talked about

for feeling better was to working.

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Basically with your calling, like finding

something that you love and doing it,

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and you know, I, I have always focused

on that probably since my late forties,

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but I want you to know that sounds so

dreamy, but there were always pieces

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of it that I didn't love, like I loved.

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When I was doing mediations, I

loved helping people work together.

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I loved doing the podcast.

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I didn't love sitting down and

going through divorce paperwork.

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I didn't love every aspect of

couples who could get kind of

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gnarling gnarly at each other.

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And now as I journey through life.

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It's even more important to me to

find that joy, to find that ease

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and that just like love of myself

and just being okay with what I.

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Like, and what, what I

value and not judging it.

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And so, you know, one of the things you

all know, I'm, I'm writing that book

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and I do feel like that's a calling.

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I feel like that's a calling from God.

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And, and it meets my passion.

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It is what I am passionate about.

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However, there are days when I

go, like today I still haven't

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done my two hour writing block.

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Sometimes it's a little hard for me

to sit my fanny in this chair, um, or

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go in the, you know, in the kitchen,

sit at the counter and sit there for

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two hours and, and work through the

outline of the book and the chapters.

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And once I get into it, I get lost in it.

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And I do love it.

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But I just want to say like, it probably

isn't all going to be stuff that you love.

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Like let it be the best that it can be,

and I think a lot of that can be like.

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The people you work with, the environment

that you're in, do you feel like you are,

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um, helping someone and, you know, you

can help people I think almost in any job.

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You know what I mean?

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Like, I even think like I cleaned

toilets when I was in college.

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Well, I kinda help people feel better

about when they were living in the

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dorms about going in the bathroom

because they, it felt better.

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So it doesn't have to be

big, but I think that, um.

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You can find a lot of joy if you do find

things that are purposeful and um, and in

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a great environment and that you basically

feel called and passionate about doing.

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And a lot of times what she

talked about was to find,

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figure out what your gifts are.

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You figure out what your gifts

are that kind of leads you to, um.

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What you, what you're good at

is often what you like to do.

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Not always, but often it points you in

the right direction and it can make your

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life easier if you are good at something.

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So that's something to to keep in mind.

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So, you know, and another thing that.

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That Heather talked a lot about why she

wanted to get into the work of, she's

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a women's only divorce, um, agency in

Florida, and she wanted to help women

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who were divorcing feel their worth.

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I do too, and I want, I

actually want every woman.

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To feel their worth.

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And she was saying how she often will,

if they can't come up with something

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to make them feel worthy, she'll

give them, um, borrow them thoughts.

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And you know, I think one of those

borrowed thoughts that hit me when

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I was going through my journey

was, you're a daughter of the king.

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And when I heard that, I was like,

Ooh, it felt like it took off.

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Um, me trying to perform and that I was

just God's daughter and that he adored me

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and he created me, and that gave me worth.

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So do your due diligence

or work with someone.

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You can work with me, work with a

coach to help you figure out how to.

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Feel worthy.

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And you know, a lot of times it's just

sitting back looking at how you feel

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and then think, how do I wanna feel if

you're going through something hard,

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sometimes you have to sit a long time.

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I mean, I think I sat months feeling the

way I felt and I think I needed to, when I

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was going through that diagnosis, I needed

to sit and rest and um, and then I could

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move forward and start thinking about.

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How do I wanna feel?

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And then one other thing that I just

wanted to mention that she talked

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about, and I think so many times in

my life I have thought if I switched

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something, like if I changed my kids'

schools or if I switched the church

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I was going to, or the job that I was

doing, I was like, oh, well I'm failing.

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I'm making a mistake.

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I'm jumping the ship.

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This is what I want you to know.

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Pivoting is not failing.

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Mistakes are not failing.

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It's all learning and pivoting

brings you to a better spot.

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I am so thankful that I changed my

children's schools when I did not.

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All of some of them stayed.

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Some of them switched and some one

of 'em switched a couple times and

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then we found, um, that perfect.

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Fit for her, or the best fit for her.

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So don't be, don't be hard on yourself.

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I guess that's what I wanna say.

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Speak to yourself like you would to

your best friend, your sister, or

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your baby daughter, because that's

how God wants you to talk to yourself,

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and it's never too late to find the

career and the life and to feel better,

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to feel the way you want to feel.

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There's always going to be.

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50 50 of the negative and the

positive, but you are in charge of

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how you feel and you get to learn.

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If you didn't have that

negative, you wouldn't be able

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to learn what you really need.

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So if you wanna hear more from Heather

about changing careers and her law

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practice, go back to Tuesday's episode.

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It's a great one.

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Thank you so much for being here.

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You take good care.